Psychologist explains extreme jealousy of ‘Othello syndrome’

Imagine a person so consumed by jealousy that they subject their partner to lie detector tests every time they come home, constantly monitoring their partner’s activities by checking their phone, emails, and bank statements multiple times a day, and even going so far as to forbid their partner from watching television shows or looking at magazines featuring the opposite sex.

While this scenario may sound like something out of a movie, it is a harsh reality for those suffering from Othello syndrome. The syndrome is named after the famous jealous character in Shakespeare’s play, Othello, whose unfounded jealousy leads to his own downfall and that of those close to him.

This rare psychiatric illness leads individuals to irrationally believe that their romantic partner is unfaithful, even when they have no evidence to support this belief.

What is Othello syndrome?

According to a 2022 study published in European psychiatry, Othello syndrome is a psychiatric disorder characterized by delusional jealousy and irritability. It is often associated with psychiatric or neurological disorders. The most common are delusional disorder and dementia. People with Othello syndrome are convinced, without any real evidence, that their partner is cheating on them. They may exhibit signs such as:

• Persistent jealousy. The person concerned constantly accuses his partner of infidelity without any real proof.
• Obsessive thoughts. They may repeatedly check their partner’s phone, emails, or social media for signs of cheating.
• Behavioral changesThey can become controlling, wanting to know where their partner is at all times and with whom.

People with Othello syndrome often suffer from neurological or psychiatric disorders. Patients with Parkinson’s disease, for example, may experience hallucinations and delusions, which can lead to unfounded accusations.

People with schizophrenia or dementia may develop irrational beliefs about their partner’s infidelity. Chronic drug addicts may also have paranoid thoughts about their partner cheating.

A recent study found that the average age of people with Othello syndrome was 58 years, with more men affected than women (nearly 2 men for every woman). The causes of Othello syndrome were:

• Primary psychiatric disorders (22% of cases)
• Other pathologies such as stroke, Alzheimer’s disease, vascular dementia, meningioma and pituitary adenoma (52% of cases)
• Medications or other substances (26% of cases)

The most common causes among these groups were delusional disorder, stroke, and medications that affect dopamine levels in the brain.

Previous experiences of infidelity or abandonment can also contribute to the development of these delusions. For example, one Reddit user shared her father’s experience with Othello syndrome: “He has been accusing my mother of cheating for several years now. My uncle thinks it’s because he cheated on my mother once, a long time ago. He thinks my father is so afraid to face the truth that he is a cheater that it’s easier for him to make it seem like my mother cheated and therefore all the attention should be on her.”

How does Othello syndrome affect relationships?

A 2012 study identified 105 cases of delusional jealousy in patients with neurodegenerative Othello syndrome from the Mayo Clinic’s electronic medical records system. Here’s what doctors reported about some of the patients:

• “He says the reason for his hunger strike is that his wife is having an affair with several other patients in the nursing home and occasionally receives them in the living room.”
• “He says he sees his wife having sex in a theater and hears his wife’s voice moaning as if she was having an orgasm.”
• “She states: ‘When we make love, he turns away, goes out into the living room, dances for her and then comes back.’ When asked if the patient actually saw the woman or spoke to her, she replies: ‘No.'”

Although these are clinical cases of delusional jealousy, individuals suffering from pathological jealousy in everyday life can also exhibit similar behaviors. These individuals may exhibit obsessive, controlling, and sometimes even violent behaviors to ensure the fidelity of their partner.

Living with Othello syndrome has significant consequences for the sufferer and their partner. For the partner, the constant accusations and intrusive controls put a strain on the relationship, causing stress and anxiety. For the person with the syndrome, the delusions create a perpetual state of distrust and paranoia, seriously affecting their mental well-being.

“I can’t live this life. To be clear, I have never cheated on her (his wife), not once. But I am being accused of the most outrageous thing I have ever done,” one Reddit user complained about his wife’s behavior. “She has accused me of having sex with dozens of women, some of whom I have no idea about. If I talk to a woman or she smiles or talks to me, she says I have to have sex with that person. I never have the time or the opportunity. She is always watching me.”

The distress and confusion felt by people whose partners suffer from Othello syndrome can be considerable. The constant accusations and surveillance can create a toxic environment, putting a strain on the relationship.

“Her boyfriend used to sit me down every day and tell me about a social media post, a hug that was too short, or anything I did that day that made him feel like I didn’t love him enough or had a secret relationship I wasn’t telling him about. It’s not funny,” another Reddit user said.

Constant distrust can lead to frequent arguments and a breakdown in communication. Both the person with Othello syndrome and their partner may experience significant emotional distress and stress.

Understanding Othello Syndrome highlights the devastating impact of irrational jealousy on relationships and well-being. It highlights the importance of mental health in maintaining healthy relationships and reveals how extreme jealousy can turn a marriage into a nightmare.

Is Your Jealousy Normal or Borderline Pathological? Take Time Cognitive Jealousy Scale for a science-backed answer.