- The stress of looking for ways to relax can increase anxiety, leading to a feeling of “stress relaxation.”
- Health experts say there are several ways to avoid or overcome the feeling of “stress.”
- Chronic stress can increase a number of health risks, including high blood pressure, heart attacks and strokes.
Recognizing that you are stressed and need to relax is a good step to help yourself.
However, when finding ways to de-stress adds even more stress to your life, you risk feeling “slack,” a counterproductive effect that can lead to a vicious cycle of increased anxiety and worry.
“This term refers to the phenomenon or experience of people who are in a state of anxiety or stress and who attempt to calm down and feel more relaxed by forcing themselves to take a break or relax,” Dr. Michael Schirripa, psychiatrist, podcast host and author of the upcoming novel Mindhunt, told Healthline.
When people force themselves to relax, they may become more anxious and worry more about how they are actually managing to relax.
The clinical term for “stressed” is relaxation-induced anxiety, said Deborah Serani, Psy.D., a professor at Adelphi University and author of the award-winning book “Living with Depression.”
“Research suggests that if you already have generalized anxiety or overthinking, you may be more prone to stress release. Other evidence suggests that people who have difficulty relaxing may also experience panic attacks on top of their stress and anxiety. And then there are others who may become depressed because they can’t relax freely,” she told Healthline.
In many ways, the brain resists forced relaxation, particularly the part of the brain called the amygdala, which is always on the lookout for danger.
“We need to remember that our brain is always active and is actually designed to worry. After all, this anxiety can keep us alive because we are always aware of potential dangers that can threaten us,” Schirripa said.
People who live with anxiety, worry and ruminations have difficulty with cognitive control, meaning they have trouble putting certain thoughts “on hold,” Serani said.
“On another note, some people may need to stay busy because unconsciously, being calm, having space, and feeling comfortable can give rise to negative thoughts or memories of experiences traumatic,” she added.
Schirripa said people have difficulty relaxing because of external pressures and internal dynamics.
External pressures, such as work, study, family and other commitments, can make people feel constantly “connected” to the outside world and available to others.
“They may then feel obligated to meet the demands of these outside influences, which can lead to the perception that they are not allowed to have free time or relaxation space reserved for them,” Schirripa said.
Serani stressed that working time and free time no longer have definitive limits.
“In the past, the workday ended at 5 p.m. and weekends were for rest and relaxation, and on Sundays, the shops were closed, which helped facilitate time spent at home and relaxing. Those predictable guidelines simply don’t exist anymore,” she said.
Moreover, technology, access, and other modern conveniences have blurred the lines between work and leisure, leading to what Princeton University sociologist Dalton Conley has called “Weisure” (the merging of work and leisure activities).
“So it becomes very difficult to carve out time for relaxation,” Serani said.
Internal dynamics that affect the ability to relax include feeling the drive to stay active and not giving yourself permission to slow down and relax.
“Sometimes people worry that they will be bored if they are relaxed or, on the contrary, that they will have to slow down and relax, and that they will have to focus too much on the thoughts or feelings that are going through them,” explains Schirripa.
Chronic stress has been linked to
“Depression and anxiety can arise, as can social, relationship and interpersonal difficulties when you don’t stop to smell the roses,” Serani said.
Not being able to disconnect and relax properly can “reset” the nervous system to operate at an overstimulated level, added Natalie Christine Dattilo, PhD, clinical psychologist, founder of Priority Wellness and Harvard instructor. Medical School.
“Over time, this can make it more difficult to achieve a relaxation response,” she told Healthline. “I meet people who tell me they feel restless, nervous and anxious ‘from the neck down,’ but who don’t describe feeling mentally anxious at all…which, to me, is an indication that we need to actively reset their default activation state through intentional relaxation practice. »
When trying to relax, Dattilo says you first need to understand that relaxation isn’t as passive an activity as you think, and it doesn’t come naturally to some people.
“I think one of the main reasons why some people have difficulty relaxing is that it is a skill that we need to practice regularly in order to fully experience its beneficial effects,” Dattilo said.
People often confuse relaxation with “zoning out.”
“It can certainly give our brains a break, but the real goal of relaxation is to ‘downshift’ our nervous system,” Dattilo said.
The downgrade is done via a
“It counteracts the negative effects of stress and returns our nervous system to a homeostatic balance,” she said.
Triggering the relaxation response can be done through visualization, muscle relaxation, massage, breathing techniques, meditation, prayer, and yoga.
Try the following tips to put relaxation into motion.
- Set boundaries between work and personal life“Also consider disconnecting from technology early each evening. Make your self-care a priority and learn to manage it on a daily basis,” Serani said.
- Practice the Benson relaxation method, which
implied Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes, intentionally relax all muscles, starting at the feet and moving up to the head, breathing slowly, for 20 minutes. “This will probably feel a little difficult or forced at first, so start with 5 minutes and gradually increase,” Dattilo said. - Focus on a “to do” list to remind yourself of what you’ve already accomplished. “Thinking about your to-do list projects you into the future, keeping you from being in the present moment,” Serani said. “Highlighting your to-do list will help you celebrate your completed tasks and encourage relaxation. A to-do list helps you dwell on the past.”
- Participate in a 5-minute meditation. “Studies
to show “Even 5 minutes of deep breathing, silence and rest can improve mental and physical functioning,” Serani said. If you can spend more time meditating, consider a guided meditation with an app, or simply rest, take a nap or enjoy some solitude, she said. - Nourish your senses and ground yourself using the “5,4,3,2,1 Technique” to reduce anxiety so you can relax more easily. “Ask yourself to find 5 things you can see, 3 things you can hear, 4 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste,” Serani said.